As tantric sex rises in popularity and more wide-eyed, adventure-seeking lovers buckle in for some tantric loving, I delved into the what, why and how about this sexual practice.
What is Tantric Sex?
The basic definition of tantric sex is slow, non-orgasmic intercourse — but it’s so much more than that.
Tantric sex has an impressive 5000-year long history, and first emerged in ancient India as a physical invocation of the spiritual and philosophical ideology of Tantra. Tantra is a means of centering the energies of the body, mind and soul to dispel negativity and blockages while awakening the spirit. It is believed that by connecting the mind, body and soul with the universe through Tantra, you’re able to channel your deepest desires powerfully.
Therefore, tantric sex is said to help to induce heightened sensation, orgasm and connection, as well as boosting your overall health. Longer and more powerful orgasms? Where do I sign! But that’s not the only reason that tantric sex is growing once again in popularity. In Sanskrit, Tantra means “to weave together” or “to loom”. So Tantra sexology aims to weave together the physical and the spiritual — body to body, mind to mind, spirit to spirit. In bringing the two together, Tantra explains that you, in turn, weave together the human with the divine — heightened both sexual pleasure and heavenly bliss!
Now you understand what it is, read on to find out why you should try it for yourself:
Rebuilds your intimacy
Our modern lives are so busy, most of us feel like we’re being pulled in a thousand different directions at any given time. Most of the time, we’re worn down, stressed out and uptight. The worst part? ‘Life’ takes its toll on our relationships. Even with the best intentions, date nights with our significant other can quickly become overwhelmed by work emails, overdue bills and everyday chores. Moments of pure, uninterrupted intimacy are hard to come by.
Tantric sex isn’t like a quick bonk on the sofa between episodes of your favourite show. Instead, it is a leisurely affair that keeps your connection to your partner at its very heart and focus. As your breath becomes synced, your bodies wrapped around each other, and your pleasure grows, you’ll feel yourself becoming more connected to each other. After all, Tantra does mean to loom and so every aspect of tantric sex is designed to help you to experience a deep coming-together — a dissolution of one into the other. Tantric sex isn’t just about sex but is also a deeply and profoundly intimate process of sexual and spiritual connection.
Sex isn’t just about orgasms…
Non-orgasmic sex may sound a little pointless, but…you’re mistaken! Sure, there are very few pleasures more intoxicating than an orgasm, but focusing all of your energy on either experiencing an orgasm or holding off on the release can sometimes get in the way of your enjoyment of all the bits in between.
Tantric sex is the sexual version of “it’s not the destination; it’s the journey that counts.” When you take away the goal of orgasming from your sexual encounters, you’ll find that you begin to savour other aspects of your union. You indulge other sensations, explore different desires, and open yourself up to a whole new horizon of pleasure.
…but if you do orgasm, ride the waves
If you’ve only heard one thing about tantric sex, it’s probably that you can experience multiple and prolonged orgasms. And who doesn’t just love the sound of that? Although the goal of tantric sex isn’t orgasm, it doesn’t mean you won’t feel orgasmic pleasure.
What we normally strive for in sex is called a “peak orgasm” — that sudden and mindblowing release of pressure, which is more often than not followed by a deep feeling of lethargy and exhaustion. During tantric sex you train your body to experience orgasms in waves, pulling back each time you begin to peak so that the pleasure is prolonged and you can ride the waves of orgasmic bliss. The more you practice, the longer, more powerful and profoundly fulfilling your orgasms become.
Live in the moment
We’re all guilty of losing ourselves in the black hole that is social media. We start with a quick look at our besties newest post and then down the rabbit hole we go, spiralling through a vortex of virtual reality. And there’s nothing immediately wrong with that — the only problem is that these virtual worlds draw us out of our real lives. Next time you’re out, have a look around you and take note of how many people who are with friends, partners or lovers — but remain glued to their phones.
Living in the moment, or learning how to make yourself “present” is a goal of a lot of spiritual practices — meditation and yoga, for instance. But there’s no better, more pleasurable, or seductive way to get a bit YOLO than with t sex. In a world where everything is supercharged, where a world of information and people are only ever a click away, tantric sex teaches us the importance of slowing down and grounding ourselves in the moment. In tantric sex, every sensation heightens — deep breath, wet touch, tingling vibrations. By slowing down and focusing your mind, body and spirit on the present, a whole new realm of pleasure awaits you.
If you’re interested in tantric sex, then why not try out tantric massage as your first step into exploring the practice?
Author Bio: Rose Colette Aston is the resident blogger for London Tantric, a prestigious, personable and professional Tantric Massage Agency in London. Rose has extensive experience as both a giver and receiver of therapeutic massage, meditation and breathing techniques.
